I Did IVF at 45. Here's How It Went.
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92 shots later, I completed my first round of IVF.
If you had told me even a year ago that I'd be writing those words, I'm not sure I would have believed you. But here I am on the other side of a process that pushed me, humbled me, and ultimately gave me something I didn't have before: options.
For those just joining, this journey started with a conversation I almost didn't have. Dr. Shahin Ghadir was a guest on my podcast, and he said something that stopped me in my tracks. He told me that at 45, this was likely my last real window to preserve the option of having children. Not a guarantee, but a choice. He explained that if I waited much longer, that choice would be made for me by biology.
I spent three months sitting with that conversation before I made the call. Three months of researching, talking with my husband Adam, and asking myself what I really wanted. The truth is, I've never had that burning desire for kids that some people describe, but I also never fully closed the door. What I realized is that I didn't want to close it by default. I wanted to be the one to decide.
So I started the process with Dr. Ghadir and HRC Fertility, and what followed was one of the most intentional seasons of my life.
The Day to Day
The daily reality of IVF became my entire routine. My mornings started with a shot before coffee, followed by nourishing meals built around protein, eggs, and more bone broth soup than I ever thought I'd consume. Hydration became a full time job with water and electrolytes constantly by my side, along with my prenatals and supplements.
Several days a week I'd head to HRC for labs and ultrasounds to track how my follicles were developing. I swapped my weight training for walks because my body needed gentle movement instead of intensity, which was an adjustment for someone who loves the gym. I added acupuncture twice a week to support blood flow and keep my nervous system calm, which became one of the things I looked forward to most.
The evenings were the hardest part. Four injections that I dreaded every single day, some of which burned and left my stomach sore and sensitive. My husband Adam became a professional at mixing medications and administering shots without leaving bruises, and we developed a system that worked for both of us. Then I'd prioritize sleep because my body was working harder than it ever has.
I've written about all of this in detail in a previous blog because I wanted people to see what IVF actually looks like beyond the surface level conversation. It's not just the shots and the hormones. It's a complete lifestyle shift that asks you to slow down, listen to your body, and trust the process even when you can't control the outcome. For someone who spent over a decade in survival mode fighting Lyme disease and Lipedema, learning to slow down was its own kind of challenge.
I also want to be honest though. As demanding as the process was, it was more manageable than I expected. Once I was in it, everything became about taking it one day at a time. One shot at a time. One appointment at a time. The hardest part wasn't the injections or the early mornings at the clinic. The hardest part was making the decision to start.
The Trigger Shot
After about two weeks of stims and monitoring, it was time for the trigger shot. This is the injection that tells your body to prepare for retrieval, and the timing has to be perfect. You're given a specific window down to the minute because retrieval happens exactly 36 hours later. There's no room for error.
I had been handling everything pretty well up until this point, but the trigger shot hit different. For the first time in the entire process, I actually felt wiped. Not just tired, but hit by a truck exhausted. My body had been a trooper through all the stims, so this caught me off guard. I gave myself full permission to rest and just let my body do what it needed to do to prepare for retrieval the following day.
Retrieval Day
Egg retrieval ended up being the easiest part of the whole process, which I was not expecting. You go in, they put you under twilight anesthesia, and you're out for maybe 15 to 20 minutes. The procedure itself is quick and you remember absolutely nothing. I woke up in recovery, stayed for about 30 to 60 minutes while the grogginess wore off, and then went home to rest.
I slept most of that day, which my body clearly needed after everything it had been through. But by the next morning I felt like myself again, so much so that I filmed a cooking segment on KTLA. If that doesn't tell you how quickly you can bounce back from retrieval, I don't know what will.
Coming Back to Myself
The days after retrieval were all about letting my body recalibrate. I definitely felt puffy and fluffy from all the hormones, which is completely normal when your body has just been through that much stimulation. By my next cycle though, things started to even out. The puffiness is going down and I finally feel like myself again.
The best part is that I got cleared to go back to the gym. I cannot tell you how much I missed my morning workouts during this process. Walking was fine while I was stimming, but there's something about lifting that makes me feel strong and grounded. Getting that piece of my routine back has been everything for my mental and physical wellbeing.
What This Journey Gave Me
I don't know how this story ends. There are still decisions ahead, still no guarantees, and still a long road if we decide to move forward with surrogacy and building our family. But I do know that I'm glad I did this. I won’t always have a thought in the back of my mind of what if.
I'm glad I had that initial conversation with Dr. Ghadir. I'm glad I gave myself three months to really sit with the decision instead of rushing into it. I'm glad I trusted the process even when it was hard. Most of all, I'm glad I have a doctor and a team at HRC Fertility who made me feel supported and informed every step of the way. I never felt rushed or dismissed. I felt like a partner in my own care, which made all the difference during something this vulnerable.
If fertility has been on your mind, even quietly in the background, I hope my story shows you that it's worth exploring. You don't have to have it all figured out. You don't have to be certain about what you want. You just have to be willing to have the conversation and see where it leads.
Dr. Ghadir is currently accepting new patients at HRC Fertility, and one consultation can shift everything.
📖 Read the blogs:
Why I Started This Journey at 45:
https://thetrailtohealth.com/blog/starting-ivf-45
The Unfiltered Daily Reality of IVF:
https://thetrailtohealth.com/blog/day-in-life-ivf
